Ask A Guy

Match Made?

Submitted by: Lisa

"I recently met a guy on Match. We are totally compatible and were getting along great. I noticed a few weeks in that he was being distant. I didn't say anything, we are still casually dating at this point. One night at dinner he tells me his ex-girlfriend of 5 years who was deployed to the middle East for an unknown amount of time is now coming back into town for the summer. She will be leaving again after that. He said he can't get involved with me because he isn't emotionally available. Although he thought she was gone for good, they did have a big bad break up and he still loves her. I don't get it...she left and they ended their relationship. What is the deal here?"

Lisa, here is the deal. It sounds to me like your boy got dumped by this exgirlfriend before she took off. Us men have a very hard time letting go especially when it was not we doing the letting go. He has not and will not let her go for 1 of 2 reasons. Either a) He really is still in love with her or b) his pride is hurt and he just haven't been able to get pass that. Whatever the answer, you were not in a good place from the start. His next "girl" was doomed to be dumped by him. He was not going to let that happen to him again, he had to regain control. This is not about you, it is all about him. This is not one you want to continue with. Thank him for being unavailable.

So you caught yourself a Momma's boy!

Submitted by: Anna Guiternul

"Hi guys, here is one for you. Why does my boyfriend get so mad everytime I want to bring up his mother being too nosey and too all up into our business? I'm really not into this "mother-in-law" stereotype thing, but this is for real. He tells her all our little problems, and i can feel it every time she comes over while we have an issue with each other. I feel like i have absolutely no privacy, and no way to defend myself. Can you tell me why he keeps doing this and why he gets so mad if I try to talk to him about it?"

So the title says it all. You went and got yourself a momma's boy. So what is a momma's boy?

Here is the urban definition:
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=mommas+boy

What you have here is a boy who can't let mommy go, along with mommy who can't let her boy go.  A deadly mix.  This is a direct result of a lifelong dependency on each other nurtured by Mom's inability to let her son fly solo. So your boy has grown into a man whose happiness and direction in life is directly related to what mom thinks, says, or does. He can't help himself and there is nothing you can do until mom is no longer around and then you'll end up taking the place of mom.

He gets mad because by questioning his relationship with mom, you question his relationship with himself. And he'll never stop being a Momma's boy. So you gotta make a decision. Take it or leave it.  Momma's boy work well for some women, not for others. Figure out which one you are and then go for it. If you decide to continue with him, then enjoy your momma's boy in his glory, and bask in his  mommyness.

Good luck and let us know how it all goes. Guys feel free to add any additional comments.

Moms... Please, please, please do not allow your sons to take you to the prom. It's a beautiful gesture on his part, but come on now..!

http://www.wgrz.com/news/Daybreak_article.aspx?storyid=48785

Welcome to Ask A Guy

So this is my 1st foray into Blogland and I think I'm going to really like this. So here is the deal with this blog. I'm in the process of getting agreement from several of my buddies to deliver the male perspective to those who are baffled by us (the male) or just plain curious as to what makes us tick the way we tick. Ask us anything and you'll get an honest answer from a small group of average guys with their own personal set of opinions. Anything you want to know from a guy's point of view. So thats it. Post your questions in the comments section and we'll play it by ear from there.

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Janno